Will you JUDGE or will you HELP?

Mom: “That’s not good….you fell off your bike and got hurt. You’re not supposed to do that.”

Dad: “You didn’t even make it to the trees. You failed at your first family bike ride.”

It doesn’t seem right, does it? That’s because parents are supposed to guide, teach, and encourage. They’re supposed to help you learn how to do your best. And most of us, when we think about the best teachers we’ve had, remember people who also helped, guided, taught, and encouraged us.

Judging is the opposite of that.

What we’re really talking about, in other words, is evaluation and assessment. The two terms are often conflated, especially within education. We’d like to suggest (as we’ve been doing for 25 years or so) that there is a meaningful difference between the two and that understanding that difference opens a world of possibilities:

While evaluation is used to judge the quality of a current performance against a set standard, the main purpose of assessment is to provide feedback that helps a person improve the quality of a future performance.

The first take was evaluation. Let’s try assessment:

Mom: “Wow…that was quite a spill. It looked like your foot slipped off the pedal when you tried to stop. Are you OK?”

Dad: “It’s easy to let your feet slip off the pedals when you’re just coasting, but that can make it hard to put your feet back on them to stop. Would you like me to jog beside you while you practice coasting then stopping?”

Notice that there’s no empty praise here…and no hint of condescension. What there is, though, is empathy, understanding, a suggestion for how to improve, plus an offer to help the improvement happen.

If we want to see improvement, whether in others or ourselves, we’ve got to decide to help instead of judge.

The module explains how measurement, assessment, and evaluation are related, and will help you practice the kind of assessment that really makes a difference.

The module runs in any browser and should be accessed through a PC or laptop. Available now for $10.



A Picture is Worth A Thousand Words

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Assessment and

Light Bulbs

Q How many assessors does it take to change a light bulb?

A One, obviously, because change is something we do TO light bulbs.

Q How many assessors does it take to improve someone else’s performance?

A It doesn’t matter how many assessors you have or how good they are; improvement-through-assessment isn’t something we can do TO others.

For assessment to work (i.e., improve performance), we must understand that the person being assessed is always in control. Not because they should be, based on some kind of ethical reasoning, but because they literally are....

Choosing Celebration Instead of Regret

In Buddhism, desire is thought to be the cause of all suffering. One extremely common kind of desire is regret: the wish for that which is contrary to reality.

You can regret both things that you’ve done as well as missed opportunities:

I wish I hadn’t done X.  

AND  

I wish I had done X.

A fairly reliable way to trigger regret, especially among high achievers, is to not meet the expectations you have for yourself. “I should have done better” is a familiar refrain for many.

I once got a 98 on a high school math exam and was very excited about having done so well; it was a difficult course and test...

Instructors will be able to choose 10 of the book's activities (see below) and we'll put together the package for your students. You'll receive access to the answer keys and additional resources, along with the purchase link to share with your students. 10 great activities for only $15!

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Turning a TO-DO List into a WANT To-Do List

The list of things we should or need to do tends to get longer as the days go by, making us feel a bit like Sisyphus, perpetually rolling the boulder up the hill of the ever-lengthening list of things to do.

The key to not only creating and keeping a realistic TO DO list, but making real progress with it is to separate the NEED to do tasks from the WANT to do tasks.

The stuff we want to do is generally no problem; we're already motivated to tackle those tasks. The need to do tasks are much more difficult.

Here's what you do:

For each NEED to do item, ask yourself "What would turn this into a WANT to do task?"

A good example is a dental check-up. Only masochists inherently want to visit the dentist. But if we consult for a moment with our future (and hopefully ideal) self, and ask "What does ideal/future me say about this?", we come to appreciate that a dental check-up is a key part of maintaining health and avoiding tooth pain and problems. That goes a long way towards making a dental check-up a WANT to do item. Future me very much WANTS me to make and keep this appointment. And while maybe that's not reason enough to break out the party hat, it's good enough to motivate me to tackle that item.